Tuesday, December 03, 2013

Boris fails IQ test!

Give me strength. 'Gotcha' quizzes of politicians are rubbish at the best of times (disclosure: I have no fucking clue what the price of a pint of milk is, because I never buy a pint of milk, and I never buy milk on its own), but this one that Boris 'failed' rather takes the cake:
Q.1 How many apples would you have if you took two apples from three apples?
Boris answered one, on the basis that if you subtract two from three you get one. But, aha! In this case 'take' just means take, so Boris is a stupid head.

Q.2 A man builds a house with four sides of rectangular construction, each side having a southern exposure. A big bear comes along. What colour is the bear?
The correct answer here is white, because the only place that all four walls could have a southern exposure is the North Pole. Where polar bears live. Except that they don't, because they are on the seaboard where the food is. So it's just as likely to be a fucking polka dotted maroon bear from Hamleys as a polar bear.

Q.3 I went to bed at eight o'clock in the evening and wound up my clock and set the alarm to sound at nine o'clock in the morning. How many hours sleep would I get?

I don't think Boris answered this one at all, but the 'correct' answer is one hour, "because wind up clocks aren't 24 hour". Which is bollocks.

If these are actual legitimate IQ-test style questions then the entire concept is flawed. But they look nothing like the sort of thing I used to plough through (library is to book as book is to page, or the next number in the sequence). They're just wanky point-scoring rubbish that don't even make sense on their own terms, but get a nice lot of schadenfreude-y headlines about how Boris failed an IQ test.


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