Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Comatose-izzazione

Three small snippets from today's Daily Telegraph caught my eye, on an otherwise fairly unremarkable news day. Firstly, we learn that Flavio Briatore, the Formula One team director, has been ordered to appear at the corruption trial of David Mills (yep, it's still going on..), after failing to attend as a witness. Mills (in case you have forgotten) is accused of accepting a £350,000 bribe from Silvio Berlusconi, Italy's former PM. He was also responsible for defining how not to deal with the media when they are camped outside your house. After emerging one morning he defiantly told reporters - "Check this out: strumentalizzazione" - and then proceeded to drive over a cameraman's foot and then into the open door of a photographer's car, shearing the wing mirror off his own BMW. I think the footage is appearing in 'Jackass 3'...

Second item of note is the story of Jan Grzebski from Poland who slipped into a coma in 1988 and has just woken. He is gradually trying to adjust to life in 2007 after 19 years asleep. Back in '88 life was rather different - George Bush was in the White House, war was raging in Afghanistan and the Russians were pointing nuclear weapons at major Western cities...

And finally, from coma to comatose, we hear that the Prime Minister's wife is to tour the United States giving a series of speeches and lectures. Apparently, two subjects are banned - the war and the husband. Nevertheless, tickets are selling fast and she is rumored to be set to gross (no pun intended) £90k for the mouth-opening. Perhaps someone at the back of the audience could ask if she is planning on looking up her ancestors whilst she is over - Cherie Blair is allegedly the first cousin four times removed of the American actor John Wilkes Booth who assassinated Abraham Lincoln.

'Scorchio!' as they say in the Jowell household...

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